The Hemp Connection:
therapy

As with all professions, there’s a diversity of spiritual belief among psychotherapists, ranging from the atheists to devout Christians, Jews, Buddhists, Hindus, and Muslims. There are those who call themselves “spiritual but not religious,” and those who would say they’re agnostic, always questioning. Some outright label themselves as “Buddhist Psychologists” or “Christian Therapists.” Except in the latter case, it’s generally presumed that psychotherapy and spirituality are separate disciplines, and never the twain shall meet.

I have often wondered though, how a truly great therapist can be utterly godless. Surely it is helpful to have some construct in one’s mind that god, the universe, or some other greater sense of structure, belonging, and control might exist. Not only are we constantly exposed to the complex mysteries of the human brain, mind, heart, and soul, but we are also constantly exposed to the trauma, torture, disease, anger, loneliness, and sadness that brings people to our offices. All of these things are often inflicted by one human being upon another human being (child abuse, spousal abuse, introduction to addictive substances, etc.). There is a powerful depth of sadness present in the fabric and content of my work. It is especially present in issues of grief and loss, chronic illness, or terminal illness.

I always ask my clients about their spiritual background, beliefs, and practices. While I’m not qualified to be a spiritual counselor of any sort, this information gives me a context for a life, and helps to complete the description of a person. For some people, god is an explanation, a support, and a source of strength. For others, god is an excuse, or a punishing figure. Whether god is important to us personally, or in the moment, questions of god often lurk in the background. So for me, god may not be the main course, but s/he is surely present in many ways.

For example, if I have a client who lost her virginity as a result of rape, and she is a staunch Catholic, I know it’s likely that feelings of guilt and shame will be even more prominent for her. If someone had a punishing experience in parochial school and rejects organized religion, I know this is a deep wound, and the person’s sense of belonging and support has been taken away, along with their faith. When a client is suicidal, it is often faith in god, or a belief that god wouldn’t approve of suicide, that keeps the person from attempting suicide. Whether I believe in his or her form of god or not, I’ll take whatever help I can get!

In dealing with issues of chronic illness, and in particular PCOS, there’s often a lot of questioning: “Why me?” “Why did god do this to me?” “Isn’t god supposed to heal me, not make me sick?” These are important issues and needs to explore in therapy. Spirituality often relates to:

• feeling a sense of belonging;
• having faith that there is a reason, even if it’s unclear, for suffering;
• sense of powerlessness;
• ability to control;
• anger;
• need to assign blame;
• development of hopefulness;
• sources of shame, especially as related to sexuality; and
• need for explanations.

Of course it’s not just spirituality or god that provides the answers to these big questions. But in the therapist’s toolbox, addressing spirituality and how it presents in your life is part of the process of developing greater internal strength. God may be part of that. Allowing me to know you in this way is an important part of knowing how you think, what you believe in, where you feel strong, and where you feel weak, so that I can help you to repair the gaps. The ability to access my intuition and connection to a spiritual source helps me to context suffering, illness, trauma, and grief in a way that allows me to remain focused on what you need. It may also be a resource I can draw your attention back to when the going gets tough. In a nutshell, that’s what god’s got to do with it.

Gretchen Kubacky, Psy.D. is a Health Psychologist in private practice in West Los Angeles, California. She has completed the inCYST training. She specializes in counseling women and couples who are coping with infertility, PCOS, and related endocrine disorders and chronic illnesses.

If you would like to learn more about Dr. HOUSE or her practice, or obtain referrals in the Los Angeles area, please visit her website at www.drhousemd.com, or e-mail her at AskDrHouseMD@gmail.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askdrhousemd.

Before the bathroom humor starts popping into your head, I want to say that I’m quite serious about this one. As a psychologist, over time, it is typical for people to feel quite comfortable telling me virtually anything that might be perceived as shameful, embarrassing, or humiliating. Confidentiality and acceptance are key to successful therapy, and creating an atmosphere that invites disclosure is important – if I don’t know what’s REALLY going on, how can I help you?

As a health and medical psychologist, I gather more than the usual amount of medical information from my clients. Many of them are dealing with PCOS, infertility, diabetes, and other endocrine conditions that can result in bowel irregularities. Anxiety often results in diarrhea, as do irritable bowel syndrome, Crohn’s disease, and related conditions. Thyroid disorders also alter bowel functioning. Cancer treatments affect regularity. And the list goes on and on.

What I usually hear is a client bringing up the issue by saying, “Um, you probably don’t want to really hear about this, but, um, I’m having this um, problem with, um, diarrhea… ” As they trail off, I reassure them that I’m used to hearing this stuff, and I actually want to hear it. Truly, I have heard it all in this department. This is an enormous relief to the client, who has often been too embarrassed to tell one of her doctors about it. Because I see the client weekly, there’s a much higher level of trust than with a doctor whom she seems every few months.

This information is helpful to me diagnostically, because I instantly know a great deal more about what’s driving stress and anxiety (if you’re prone to sudden loose stools, it can contribute to social anxiety and fear of leaving the house, for example). It helps me normalize certain behaviors or symptoms, and be alert to other things that might be troubling the client. Quite often, we are so used to having irregularities in our bodies – food cravings, random menstrual cycles and the like – that bowel irregularities get overlooked. When you can’t get pregnant, you’re generally not overly concerned with chronic constipation, right?

When a client is able to trust me with this type of information, I actually feel honored. I’m not a medical doctor; I can’t perform diagnostic procedures or prescribe medication to remedy the problem. But I truly do want to know every aspect of my clients, up to and including the quality and frequency of their bowel movements. I can make referrals to medical doctors who can help. And there are psychological treatments that are effective for bowel disorders, and of course for reducing stress and anxiety.

On a more interesting note, there’s a strong gut/bowel and brain connection. A significant percentage of our neuro-transmitters are produced in the gut – around 85% of the serotonin, for example. So, if you’re experiencing cramping, bloating, diarrhea, or constipation, not only may you have a medical disorder, but it may be contributing to depression, anxiety, or other psychological conditions. In a nutshell, that’s why I want the full scoop on your poop – so I can help you as comprehensively as possible!

Gretchen Kubacky, Psy.D. is a Health Psychologist in private practice in West Los Angeles, California. She specializes in counseling women and couples who are coping with infertility, PCOS, and related endocrine disorders and chronic illnesses.

If you would like to learn more about Dr. HOUSE or her practice, or obtain referrals in the Los Angeles area, please visit her website at www.drhousemd.com, or e-mail her at Gretchen@drhousemd.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askdrhousemd.

By now, we’ve all heard that Columbus accidentally discovered America (sorry to take away your tooth fairy fantasies if I’m breaking the news to you). Obviously, there were some significant benefits to that, for those of us who live here. Since today is Columbus Day, it got me thinking about the benefits of accidental discoveries.

• A woman on a road trip with her aunt, who is the only one licensed and insured to drive in a foreign country, discovers that the maps she was so incompetent with in grammar school are actually easy to read, and kind of fun, even in Italian; she sees herself in a whole new light after this trip, and now declares herself proudly to be a great navigator.

• You’re reading a book about fashion, and discover there’s a color poetically named eau de nil, essence of nothing (a light watery grayish blue), and that it looks utterly fabulous with mustard and chalky purple.

• Someone spills chopped-up chocolate in a batch of cookie dough, and the Toll House Cookie is born. Enough said!

• There’s a marathon cutting through your neighborhood, which forces you to take the freeway to your destination – and you discover that it actually saves you ten minutes (I’m in Los Angeles, by the way, if you’re sitting there shaking your head and thinking, “Doesn’t taking the freeway always save you time? What is she talking about?”).

• You start taking walks after dinner every night for half an hour, because dusk is pleasant, you might catch a sunset, and it’s great time to share the day with your beloved – and your fasting blood sugars start going down.

• You wear a pair of sterling silver rings into the mineral hot springs and discover that all that sulfur oxidizes silver in no time flat, and that it’s pretty much irreversible, yet delightfully trendy.

All of these accidental discoveries focus on an unexpected positive. Of course there are accidental discoveries that have an entirely different feel to them – discovering your spouse in bed with another woman, discovering that your cat has left a hairball on your pillow, learning that milk CAN spoil without smelling bad first, etc. – but the point is here that that unexpected is often delightful, beneficial, tasty, time-saving, or beautiful. It might even be healthful.

We spend so much time trying to control the uncontrollable, identifying and mitigating variables, and taking steps to limit our exposure to surprises. Yet the most important and wonderful experiences we have may occur entirely as the result of accident, misjudged timing, or being willing to consider the inconceivable.

In therapy, change is achieved by stepping outside of the limits of what we think we know. (If we really KNEW, we’d have resolved the problem on our own by now, right?) The brain LIKES surprises, thrives on them, and actually seeks them for growth. Making space for the unexpected – who knew that could be a health enhancement strategy?!

Gretchen Kubacky, Psy.D. is a Health Psychologist in private practice in West Los Angeles, California. She specializes in counseling women and couples who are coping with infertility, PCOS, and related endocrine disorders and chronic illnesses.

If you would like to learn more about Dr. HOUSE or her practice, or obtain referrals in the Los Angeles area, please visit her website at www.drhousemd.com, or e-mail her at Gretchen@drhousemd.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askdrhousemd.

(Note from Monika: Dr. Gretchen will be offering counseling from our Santa Monica office. She has a few spaces left in her"pay what you can" introductory offer for Friday, September 16. If you're interested, email monika at afterthediet dot com for more information)

One of the purposes of the “Mental Health Monday” feature of this blog is to acquaint you with some of the psychological aspects of PCOS, and how mental health issues are impacted by the condition. There are also coping skills, insights and ideas about ways to help yourself, and education about how to create change.

You may have some vague symptoms that seem like something a therapist would know about, but you’re not really sure when or if it’s appropriate to have a consultation or session with me or some other health psychologist or therapist. My specialty, health psychology, focuses on medical conditions and how they impact our mental well-being.

PCOS causes or contributes to a variety of mood disorders, and can either mask or mimic some other physical conditions. It can be challenging to sort out which symptoms came first, and what your treatment priorities are. Here are some of the symptoms you may be experiencing that indicate a need for psychological evaluation and treatment, and that may be connected to your PCOS:

• Difficulty sleeping, or sleeping far too much
• Physical aches and pains
• Unexpected weight gain or weight loss
• Uncontrollable food cravings, especially for carbs
• Panic attacks, or anxiety attacks
• Feeling jittery all the time
• Mood swings
• Thoughts of suicide
• Constant irritability
• Trouble relating to other people
• Isolating yourself
• Pain issues that don’t seem to be connected to injury
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Difficulty coping with your diagnosis
• Having a new diagnosis
• Infertility issues
• A recent loss
• History of trauma, domestic violence, or other acute stressors
• Developing complications, such as diabetes

Additionally, you may want to receive education about PCOS and related mental health issues, identify a medical and psychological treatment team or plan, and work on developing coping skills and strategies for managing your PCOS. These are all things that health psychologists do, and that could be part of your reasons for consulting a health psychologist.

It can be scary to contemplate calling a psychologist, but at the same time, simply taking the first steps to get help may also result in improvement. Knowing that you’re doing something good for yourself, and that there ARE experts who can help, will often jump-start the healing process. You may be inspired to improve your self-care practices. You may also start practicing the self-care skills that you have, but haven’t been using often enough.

In a future “Mental Health Monday” post, I’ll address what actually happens in a therapy session, so you can learn more about what to expect, if you haven’t already experienced therapy.

Gretchen Kubacky, Psy.D. is a Health Psychologist in private practice in West Los Angeles, California. She specializes in counseling women and couples who are coping with infertility, PCOS, and related endocrine disorders and chronic illnesses.

If you would like to learn more about Dr. HOUSE or her practice, or obtain referrals in the Los Angeles area, please visit her website at www.drhousemd.com, or e-mail her at Gretchen@drhousemd.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askdrhousemd.