I recently completed Monika's workshop in Columbus and have come away feeling renewed on several levels. As a registered dietitian and certified diabetes educator, I always felt inadequate like I should have this all together. My shame regarding my weight and several other symptoms of PCOS held me back from many things, both personally and professionally. Monika asked if I would share my story at the workshop with two other brave dietitians. I had told my story many times before, but this time was different. I had a connection to these women for what we all had gone through regarding our own PCOS. I felt for the first time that I was not alone in my thoughts about myself and that they too had felt the same way I did when it came to the many issues PCOS brings.
My journey with PCOS is not that different from many other women. Eventually my diagnosis come when my husband and I could not conceive after 4 years. At that point the desperation for a baby completely consumed me and I did everything my reproductive endocrinologist wanted. I was relieved to hear that there was a name for what I had been experiencing and that I wasn't going crazy. However, I could not see past"the baby" to the bigger picture. We did the clomid and IUI and the very first try I conceived! I was on cloud nine only to fall into a pit of despair a few weeks later. I had miscarried at 6 weeks. Shattered, I fell into a deep depression and sought counseling. But, the next year consisted of such an emotional roller coaster of month after month attempts to try to get pregnant via IUI to no avail. Financially and emotionally drained, we gave up. But, it doesn't end there.
My deep faith in God is undoubtedly what got me through such a terrible time. For whatever reason, He chose to close my womb. I asked Him to take the burning desire to have a child away, but it only got stronger. MUCH TO OUR SURPRISE, 2 months later I conceived with out the help of doctors; the old fashion way! I was on metformin, but this was a miracle! What followed was a very difficult, high risk pregnancy, complicated with gestational diabetes and preterm labor. My son was born at 37 weeks and is a happy, precocious 4 year old today! I did have post partum issues as well, with depression and failure to continue to breast feed after 4 weeks. I wish I had known about Monika and Omega-3's effect on PCOS back then, but I believe all things happen for a reason.
I know that my experience has made me a more empathetic and effective practitioner. My heart is to reach out to others suffering through the devastating effects of PCOS. Hopefully, I can help someone grieving through the infertility and child loss that I experienced.
Hannah's Heart Ministries was born out of my own grief. We are in the very early stages and are in the process of raising funds to become a 501c3 (non-profit) organization. The foundation of our ministry is to help those grieving through infertility and pregnancy loss. Hannah's Heart's Board is made up of several other women who have their own experience with infertility and child loss as well. If you would like more information for your patients or yourself, our contact info is: Hannah's Heart Ministries P.O. Box 3304 Boardman, OH 44513 or call me at 330-717-5345.
I cannot express just how grateful I am to Monika and all of you who have dedicated yourselves to helping women suffering with PCOS. As a fellow" cyster" I appreciate a practitioner who sees me more than just my diagnosis; someone who sees all of me and and who seeks to treat the big picture, especially the emotional component.
I would love to hear any of your comments, questions or concerns. Thank you for"listening" and God Bless You in your work!
Marie Mariano