‘Tis the time of year when blogs, magazines, and radio broadcasts are full of tips for combating overeating, over-drinking, and the kind of carousing that leaves you tired, bloated, overly full, and generally disgusted with yourself. They’re often repetitive, and not all that useful. I’m full of tips, techniques, and strategies myself, actually! One that I DO think is useful and easy to remember is HALT, which stands for Hungry, Angry, Lonely, and Tired.
If you’re one of those things – hungry, angry, lonely, or tired – the risk of over-indulging rises. If you’re two, three of those things, the risk of losing control is much greater. And if you’re all four of those things, watch out world, because almost nothing’s going to stand in the way of the oncoming binge, bad behavior, or acting out.
But what’s the first aspect of change? Awareness. HALT is a way to bring yourself back to a place of awareness, so you can reign in your behavior before it becomes self-destructive. Let’s talk about the specifics:
Hungry: When you’re hungry – really hungry – your blood sugar starts to drop, and you feel tired, confused, and irritable. And did we mention, hungry? Really, really hungry. Like, so hungry you could the entire contents of a small refrigerator. Or the buffet table. Or as much as you can load up on at the drive-through. Yeah, that kind of hungry. Women with PCOS are more subject to the vagaries of blood sugar dysregulation (it’s the insulin resistance thing, AGAIN) than other people. We’re more vulnerable. Accept it, and plan for it.
Strategy: Have a little healthy snack with you at all times. Know that shopping is hard work and frequently results in blood sugar drops because you’re walking more than you think. Plan ahead. Decide: “If I get hungry, I’m going to Subway for a turkey sandwich loaded up with vegetables and skip the mayo.” This will prevent you from going to McDonald’s and getting a Big Mac, large fries, and a shake.
Angry: The traffic, the crowds, the prices, the shopping for people you don’t even care about, the time pressure, and the social obligations, your spouse who still expects home-cooked meals when you’re in the middle of SHOPPING!, can all lead to a build-up of anger.
Strategy: Do not shop when you’re angry. Do not expose yourself to challenging foods or social situations when you’re angry. Take five to twenty minutes to meditate, walk around the block, drink a glass of cool water, and practice forgiveness and compassion. Now engage in your usual activities.
Lonely: So often, it’s assumed that we’re off with our friends, families, and other loved ones at the holidays, but some of us are sitting home alone, without an invitation, a thought, or a concern.
Strategy: If you’re alone, embrace it. Don’t take a shower until 3:00 p.m. Spend all day on FaceBook. Eat breakfast for dinner. Revel in your ability to live precisely how you want to live today, without judgment or interference. It can be utterly rejuvenating. If you don’t like being alone, and really do feel lonely, make a point of issuing invitations to other people, or showing up at every group event you know about, and don’t tell me it’s unfair that you have to do all the asking. Life is like that sometimes, and if you want to undo this loneliness, you will have to take action. Tell people you don’t have any plans for Christmas, and you don’t have any invitations either. Quite often, one will be forthcoming. People are feeling generous this time of year. In any case, again, avoid whatever triggers you to behave uncharacteristically. This is not a good time to shop the web, bake a cake, or order enough take-out for six people. Remind yourself that this is a temporary, and repairable, condition.
Tired: Tiredness connects to hunger quite often. Drops or dips in blood sugar can leave you feeling exhausted, confused, and overwhelmed. When you’re tired, your decision-making capacity is impaired. See where I’m going with this theme?
Strategy: If you’ve been running around like a maniac, trying to get it all done (The shopping! The cooking! The baking! The cards! The decorating! The parties! OH MY!), slash and burn. You are NOT Superwoman. I repeat, you are NOT Superwoman. No one will notice. Seriously. I used to send upwards of 100 handwritten (and often handmade) greeting cards. A few years ago, I only sent a few. Now I don’t send any, except to my mother, and that’s a maybe. Not one single person has called me out for it. Wow, what a relief!
If you feel strongly, pick a few critical priorities (i.e., my husband will definitely die, or at least pout for days, if he doesn’t get a homemade peppermint cake by Christmas, my children will be ostracized if they don’t get Chanukah gifts like everyone else, and my staff assistant is going to “lose” my messages for the rest of the year if I don’t buy her a great present) and lose the rest. Children are important; adults will have to understand. Your budget, your sanity, and your ability to get the rest you need are the most important things. The rest is not. HALT. And be well.
Gretchen Kubacky, Psy.D. is a Health Psychologist in private practice in West Los Angeles, California. She has completed the inCYST training. She specializes in counseling women and couples who are coping with infertility, PCOS, and related endocrine disorders and chronic illnesses.
If you would like to learn more about Dr. HOUSE or her practice, or obtain referrals in the Los Angeles area, please visit her website at www.drhousemd.com, or e-mail her at AskDrHouseMD@gmail.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askdrhousemd.